genau, das hier wars' wo ich noch was dazu sagen wollte... menno, ich werd auch immer vergesslicherwinterblue hat geschrieben:finding home: http://www.angelfire.com/tv2/firebird_a ... ander.html
diese eine passage hier (sorry, is halt ein wenig länger...)
das fand ich schon wahnsinnig gut geschrieben... irgendwie finde ich wird in den fanfics die standpunkte der einzelnen figuren meist viel besser beschrieben und wirklich gezeigt, als in der serie selbst. klar, die schreiber bauen halt auf diesen emotionen auf, aber das machen die serie.schreiber doch auch... trotzdem, in fic's find ich's meistens besser..."Spike, why won't she leave him?"
~Bloody hell.~ "Well, Xan, there are lots of reasons, I guess. Yer mum doesn't know any different, pet. All she knows is hurt and pain and abuse. She knows it's not right. She knows there's somewhere out there that it doesn't happen, but that place is so far away from here she can't comprehend it. A person can be treated badly only so long, pet, before they start to believe they deserve it."
He continued, knowing the uncomfortable look in Xander's eye came from the realization of how he and the scoobies treated Spike. "Once they start to believe it's real, it becomes real for them. Any attention is at least attention. A slap or a punch means they're still here. Still real. An insult or hurtful word just gives them reason to get up the next day to try harder to please."
und dann das nachher...
da war ich mal wieder in tränen aufgelöst... eigentlich wusste ich schon, als spike xander fragt, warum die scobbies ihn "denn immernoch um sich haben" was kommen wird, aber als dann dieses "how long did it take for you to break" kam war ich mal wieder nur ein schluchzendes häufchen...Xander frowned. "How long does it take to get like that?"
Spike shrugged. "Depends on the person, luv. Some are strong willed. Takes longer. Those are the kind abusers take the most pleasure in breaking. Your mum? I bet she took a very long time. But break she did, pet."
Xander bit his lip. "But my mom is a wonderful person. She should know that. She deserves a lot better than this. Why can't she just see that?"
Spike smiled sadly. "So, Pet, why do you think the gang keeps you around?"
Xander flinched, then sighed. "Hell if I know. I'm severely lacking in the mojo department. I can't fight my way out of a paper sack." He laughed self-deprecatingly. "But damn do I pick out good doughnuts and coffee." He looked up to see Spike still watching him with a sad smile. "What?"
"How long did it take for you to break, luv?" He asked softly. Xander froze, eyes wide and staring into Spike's. He opened his mouth a couple of times, but nothing came out. He felt his eyes tear up, but couldn't look away. He frantically blinked, trying to keep them at bay, but felt a warm trail make its way down his cheek.
Spike stood and stepped around the table. With a gentle tug, he hauled Xander into his arms and pressed the boy's face into his shoulder. Like the floodgates had been opened, Xander's tears fell in a river, quickly soaking Spike's shirt. The vamp eased the boy backwards and laid him on the bed. He was slightly surprised when grasping hands clutched at him. Willingly, he followed them down to rest at Xander's side.
He rocked the boy, whispering nonsense things to him, petting his hair and rubbing his back. He could feel the tremors wracking the boy''s body lesson and eventually stop. Xander's breathing evened out with the exception of a hitch or two as the result of crying himself to sleep.
He continued holding the fragile human, staring at the ceiling. Dimly, he heard sound from upstairs and he curiously focused his ears in that direction. After a moment, his face shuttered and his eyes closed. He rolled over and placed his ear over Xander's heart, listening to the steady thud-thud below his cheek instead of the sacrifice of the woman two floors above him.
mensch, das mädel soll endlich weiterschreiben...







